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TED
(director/writer: Seth
MacFarlane; screenwriters: Alec Sulkin/Wellesley
Wild/based on a story by Mr. MacFarlane;
cinematographer: Michael
Barrett; editor: Jeff Freeman;
music: Walter
Murphy; cast: Mark Wahlberg (John Bennett), Mila Kunis (Lori
Collins), Joel McHale (Rex), Jessica Barth (Tami-Lyn),
Patrick Warburton (Guy), Giovanni Ribisi (Donny), Norah
Jones (herself), Sam J. Jones (himself), Aedin Mincks
(Robert), Seth MacFarlane (Ted), Patrick Stewart
(narrator), Bretton Manley (John as a kid), Matt Walsh (Thomas Murphy),
Bill Smitrovich (Frank Stevens), Robert Wu (Wu Ming),
Ralph Garman (John’s Dad), Alix Borstein (John’s Mom),
Laura Vandervoort (Tanya), Ryan Reynolds (Guy’s
Boyfriend), Tom Skerritt (Himself); Runtime:
106; MPAA Rating: R; producer: Seth MacFarlane/Scott Stuber/John
Jacobs/Jason Clark; Universal Pictures;
2012) "MacFarlane throws everything against the wall to get a laugh or two, but most of the bits fail to stick." Reviewed by Dennis Schwartz Seth MacFarlane has become
part of the pop culture scene with his scatological
humor and a machine-gun onslaught of raunchy jokes in
his animated TV shows (“The Family Guy,” “American
Dad!” and “The Cleveland Show”). For his feature film
debut MacFarlane
presents a
non-PC live-action
one-joke flick that ventures onto the same sophomoric formulaic frat house humor
turf as his TV works, but offers more plot structure
and a well-cast lead in Mark Wahlberg playing with
believable innocence a childlike manchild. For the
targeted male young adult audience it might be
appealing to laugh at poop jokes, but for others this
might not be the kind of teddy bear pic they want to
hug. It takes a healthy dose of suspended belief and a
tolerance for fart jokes to come to grips with this
kind of fantasy juvenilia. Things open in the Boston
suburbs in 1985, on Christmas Day, when lonely
8-year-old John Bennett (Bretton Manley) receives a teddy bear
present from his parents and after making a wish when
a shooting star is spotted, for teddy to be a real
friend, the toy suddenly comes to life and talks (Seth MacFarlane doing the
voice). The
foul-mouthed talking teddy becomes a celebrity, even
appearing on The Johnny Carson show. After 27 years,
the now 35-year-old bachelor John (Mark Wahlberg) lives with his best pal
teddy and has a low-paying dead-end job for a car
rental company. The wisecracking Teddy occupies most
of nice guy John's time, as they smoke pot and watch
movies together. This upsets John's long-time
suffering hot business girlfriend of the last four
years Lori Collins (Mila Kunis), who makes him choose teddy or her.
With that teddy gets his own apartment and a
supermarket counter job, where despite insulting his
boss (Bill
Smitrovich) and
screwing up he's promoted. The film's funniest bit has
John trying to guess teddy's busty checker
girlfriend's (Jessica
Barth) name by
running through every 'white trash' girl's name he
can. MacFarlane throws
everything against the wall to get a laugh or two, but
most of the bits fail to stick. There's the kidnapping
of teddy by the creepy Donny (Giovanni Ribisi), John singing at an
outdoor park concert with Norah Jones, John doing
cocaine and Flash Gordon things with Sam J. Jones,
John fighting off Lori's wealthy asshole boss (Joel McHale) from stealing his girl
and, then, MacFarlane
shoots for
emotional impact by seeing if teddy can be patched
back to life and if a more responsible Jon and Lori
can reconcile and live happily ever after. It's narrated by Patrick Stewart. That the
comedy is witless, doesn't bother this filmmaker. He
seems to be aiming to be offensive and win over the
crowd in love with naughty pop culture jokes.
Unfortunately in the third act the film runs out of
gas and becomes a stinker when it tries to get too
sentimental. MacFarlane
got trapped by not knowing where to go with this wacky
teddy bear story and his try for an impossible fairy
tale happy ending was just too unbelievable, even if
one suspended their belief. REVIEWED ON 7/1/2012 GRADE: C+ Dennis Schwartz: "Ozus' World Movie Reviews" © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED DENNIS SCHWARTZ |