|I MARRIED A WOMAN (director: Hal Kanter; screenwriter: Gooman Ace; cinematographer: Lucian Ballard Kenneth Marstella; editor: Kenneth Marstella; music: Cyril Mockridge; cast: Diana Dors (Janice Briggs), George Gobel (Marshall "Mickey" Briggs), Adolphe Menjou (Sutton), William Redfield (Eddie Benson), Jessie Royce Landis (Mrs. Blake), John Wayne (Himself), Angie Dickinson (Herself), Nita Talbot (Miss Anderson), Steve Dunne (Bob Sanders); Runtime: 84; MPAA Rating: NR; producer: William Bloom; RKO (Universal-International); 1958)|
by Dennis Schwartz
bomb. Even the title stinks. Not even a cameo from
John Wayne going romantically bonkers to his wife
Angie Dickinson in a bogus Technicolor film clip
within the b/w film can add anything to this dud.
Mediocre director Hal Kanter ("Loving
You"/"For The Love Of It") is clueless how to draw
comedy out of the unfunny screenplay by TV writer
Goodman Ace. The pairing of the timid
American nightclub comedian-turned-television-star
George Gobel and Britain's sexpot answer to
Marilyn Monroe, Diana Dors, did not work because
they lacked chemistry together. Dors found the pic so
distasteful, she sued the studio for making her
character so ridiculous.
advertising executive Marshall "Mickey" Briggs (George
Gobel) learns from his bossy boss at the Madison Ave.
agency, Sutton (Adolphe Menjou), that their prime
account Luxemberg beer threatens to cancel
unless a new ad campaign can be launched and the
boss gives him two days to save the account.
Mickey's wife Janice (Diana Dors) was a former
beauty queen and was the winner of the Miss
Luxemberg ad contest created by her future husband.
nice-guy Mickey needs space and quiet to work,
Janice, learns she's pregnant and wants more quality
time with her hubby. Janice's mom (Jessie
Royce Landis) lives with the couple, and
becomes the subject of lame mother-in-law jokes. The
strained running gag is that Mickey is unfairly
accused of neglecting his curvy wife. This is
thought of as so inconceivable that it becomes a
source for all kinds of witless jokes.
Even for TV comedy this stuff is awful. Maybe the TV comedian's fans can tolerate it, or male oglers can feel sated by just watching the Brit wiggle her ass as she walks by in a tight skirt every so often.
REVIEWED ON 6/18/2015 GRADE: C-
Dennis Schwartz: "Ozus' World Movie Reviews"
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